squeaky swings and tall grass

i so want summer skin. but listening to that song outside of summer makes me feel slightly depressed.

maybe not quite this red. that was hot. and painful.

...eleven daysssss!

bicycling on every wednesday evening...

i...really don't. i don't even know if i ever have. it's mostly been done every other day of the week, i think. haha.
anyway.

yesterday was our last real 236th summer semester ward activity. and guess what.
i was sad.

(i am aware, pretty much everything provokes some great emotion from me, which could mean you judge me to be dramatic...but if that bothers you, you should probably have stopped reading my blog by now. like, NOW. or i'm going to accidentally give you an ulcer, and i don't want that.)

I say to rachel (ratch), all the time, when I get upset about something "I wish I just didn't CARE." One time, she firmly, but kindly, said, "Missy, no you don't." And she's right, and I can't ever forget that. I'm never going to be good at saying goodbyes, but that's okay. If I'm ever in a state of not-missing-someone, either the second coming has occurred, or my heart has turned to stone. So. It's okay.
Also. I've felt a pretty constant feeling--especially since i started college--of frustration...that I'm always missing out on something. There's always somewhere else I could be, someone else I could be with, something else I could be doing. But, oh well. We have to make choices constantly in life, and as long as i don't repeatedly choose to sit home and do nothing, I'm going to have to be happy with whatever I'm doing.

SO. Since I've realized that I'm NEVER going to be able to do EVERYTHING that I wish I could, or I think I should, I should just chill out and be grateful for the things I HAVE done.

Sooooo.
thank you, my darling summer friends, (and eternal family) for helping me (since the beginning of May):
.live in the cutest, happiest, greatest ghetto apt EVER for four months with three of the BEST roomates,
.swwwwim,
.camp,
.have nice talks about everything i could possibly desire,
.be involved in the BEST ward with the BEST calling ever,
.make new friends,
.make better friends,
.read,
.enjoy otter pops and popsicles and snow cones and ice cream and un-cal-fro-yo and MOCHI,
.discover/experience lots of GREAT music,
.watch some old and new WONDERFUL films,
.try loooots of great cuisine,
.trust and be trusted,
.write happy letters,
.take happy photos,
.have fun at family gatherings,
.play at amusement parks,
.ride all over south provo on darling bicycles,
.browse the city biblioteca,
.enjoy porch sitting on summer afternoons and evenings and nights,
.shhhop,
.read lots of informative and some pointless magazine articles,
.attain more freckles and lightened hair from spending time in the ssssun,
.have bonfires. every time i remotely desired one,
.play at that freezing beautiful lake down the road,
.travel down that freezing beautiful river up the road,
.rrrroadtrip,
.looongboard,
.dance my heart out,
.overcome some secret and severely silly fears,
.play in the ocean,
.love urbanness,
.love suburbanness,
.utilize my sunglasses,
.have fun smelling drugs i'm not doing and sweaty people i don't know/attending excellent concerts,
.wear my favorite attire, over and over and over--tshirt and cutoffs/jeans,
.play with sparklers and fireworks,
.sleep in,
.laugh LOADS,
.get free breakfast,
.talk to important byu visitors and new zealanders,
.watch darling love sparks happen,
.cry for not sorrowful reasons,
.read excellent writing/see beautiful photos on bloooogs,
.LOVE,
.be loved,
.see GREAT things,
.gaze and wonder nightly at the BEAUTIFUL night sky,
.sing lots, with lots of talented guitarists and a couple ukuleleists,
.play a little bit of piano and ukulele and guitar...haha,
.help a little african's feet,
.deal with things i needed/need to,
.play nintendo,
.be creative,
.be artistic,
.express myself,
.watch some GREAT musicals,
.learn more about the gospel, people, the world, politics, government, ....lots of things,
.learn more about (by others' example): sacrifice, real love, selflessness, courage, patience, hard work, persistence, finding jooooy in all things...and so much more,
.experience joy and a special unity watching beautiful SOCCER,
.play soccer, frisbee, ultimate, and kickball,
.see a whole lacrosse game,
.enjoy countless gorgeous sunsets and other beautiful skies,
.learn lots of little slivers of languages,
.hear LOTS of awesome experiences in others' lives, especially about missions,
.and help me learn/remember a little better, who i am.

love you,
missy.

five [hundred] percent pleasure.

i was talking with a nice young man last night, watching a group of enthusiastic twenty-somethings playing four square, very... enthusiastically. we laughed about this cute little world we're living in, and how we've really got to enjoy every second of it, while it lasts. cause really...college is way too fun.

some things, a-j:
a. we can go back to sunny beautiful moab...now. if you guys want.
b. it is very possible to get sick of BYU brownies.
c. reason number 40,276 i love efy: sometimes they have leftover whatever-awesomeness placed in the third floor kitchen right when i get off.
d. provo town center is probably better than university mall. but i still hate those bridges.
e. i love living with these gingers.
f. starting now, i am one-fourth mexican.
g. troll 2 is indeed the worst film, ever.
h. i love banksy.
i. there are 4 d-words.
j. one week from tomorrow...california, here we COME.

papa, papaRAZZI.

home is whenever i'm with you!

okay...dandelions are flowers too.

jdawgs.

provo library lawn.

alec's (pre) birthday.

(inside of) beautiful fort. totally fell asleep (to peter pan soundtrack) in this, me rub and ratch's last night.

goodbye kidz.

it's been a long time, long time now, since i've seen you smile.

welcome back my dear friend. (sun)
i have loads of happy pictures i kinda want to share...but i need to find my cord.
haha.

i don't really LIKE getting obsessed with..."things", but it happens.
my" thing" right now, is beirut.



i love that feeling summer always gives me, like i can do ANYTHING and i don't have to care what ANYONE thinks, and i can just have fun with old and older friends, and famdam, and make new friends, and just plaaaay.(and work. for mone-AY)
i think it's because i've ripped off that mentality that i need to obey my scholastic instructors/institution.
see, i'd make a terrible teacher.

however, i will not gamble away my time. i am using EVERY moment.
now let me go see if i'm an auntie yet.
thank you, have a nice day. :)

it's the final beginning after the end, it's good to be ALIVE.

i took my third final today. i inadvertently arranged the perfect playlist for it a couple nights ago. as i walked out,

adVENture. we're taking off.
then,

what are we doing? what happened? do YOU know?
then

haha i can do everything. sooo.

perfection, mother.
hi summer. what's up.

this is the best day of my life...we spreaded blankets on the couch.

hi. this is my best friend. he is great. and busy being the only white person in the DR. go missions. really though. so great. for him. for everyone. (i am soooo excited for tan feet. in the summer. and freckles. and funny things.)

anyway...gueeeessss what.

this was the best day ever.

me and ratch slept in. (she's my future roomate. she's really great also.)

THEN we had a pleasant chat. (kinda like pillow talk, but in the morning. cause i fall asleep in seconds.)

i ate a bowl of captain crunch.

we brought hilary to campus. campus peoples saw my onesie...more funny than embarrassing. so it was okay.

we almost killed a couple people trying to say hi to alec...and missed him anyway. hahahha.

i got home and a letter from THAT one ^ was in the stinking mailbox...win.

bare, nathan, alec and i got fish tacos. ALWAYS a good thing.

went to work...worked with wonderful people, served nice students. (i really love nice students. they make life so much better.)

ate a wonderful nutritious din-din at work. with my pleasant co-workers.

finished early, then went to the library to quickly write a nice paper, running into my nice friend ben, who is totally living right by me this summer, win.

and now...i'm watching a film about love and family and being awesome and cartooness and special effects and old concepts bringing new happiness...no, not avatar. avavomit. SPEED RACER. with nathan, tucker, rub and ratch, and soon joce.

this day is close to perfection.

thank you, and, good night.

(also i'm going to eat broccoli omelets in the morning. and ratch is baking bananer muffins. seriously. WIN.)