take me for a [bike] ride.

i think wednesday is the worst day of the week. monday's do-able, cause everyone else is half-awake too and it ends with fhe, and tuesdays i always took less classes, and it usually ended with something happy. but wednesday...ugh.

i think it comes from college. cause the weekend still feels far away, but i couldn't relax yet cause i always had a million things due wednesday.

therefore, for subconcious and not presently logical reasons, i woke up hating today.

i remedied it with a can of mountain dew (opened not only before noon, but before eight thirty, you're repulsed, i know) and lots of top forty music (and now i REALLY need to dance). (also making me feel very weird, having not listened to any of this, stuff, in awhiiiile...) very effective. and the day is almost done...whud's up.

i love her:

i feel weird.

it's odd for me, blogging now, 'cause even though i know other people read...it felt like i was mostly blogging for myself and rachie. so now i'm mostly blogging for myself? haha.

also, it is true:
dancing gives one more endorphins than...anything.
yesterday i was considerably stressed, i had like four hours to do like seven hours worth of activities, and i ran home to eat, and i was met by a wall of excellent sound blasting from everywhere, and dear friends dancing in the middle of it. i danced for maybe two minutes, but it was so excellent.

i love thursdays, because:
the weekend has already (sneakily) begun
dinner club is usually crazy
30 Rock is on
i only have two classes
i get to sleep in
tuesday AND wednesday are over
i don't have creative writing
i usually skip spanish (for mental health reasons...i will go crazy if i go every day. period.)
i get tomato basil soup (okay that was just yesterday. thanks maaaam. :) )

aaaaaand no one ever watches videos on anyone's blog blah blah blah (well, i do. so here.)

also, this is FUHnny.

where you invest your love, you invest your life.

it seems whenever i have the most to say, i have the least to blog. ummmmm. some things:

.zooey is just as incredible in real life as she seems to be in all forms of media.
.m.ward too.
.ben probably was definitely in the trailer.
.cpk has nice hummus.
.hummus tastes especially nice in the presence of missed friends.
.i don't think i am the same i was when i was sixteen, at all...there's that.
.i LOVE being an english major.
.i didn't think it was possible, to blow out headphones, but i think i've done it. maybe three times, in the last month...haha....dang it.
.byu campus isn't just cute, it's positively frighteningly adorable. good?.
.girl hay-tahs are the BEST.
.i love musicians that play and write and sing with passion.
.i keep finding myself shushing people (like close friends, not professors) when i don't like what they're saying. rude...where did i pick that up?.
.i always forget how many people fit in provo.
.i miss ratch.
.there should be sixteen days in a week. then dinner groups would be easy.
.the DR and brasil aren't even on the same PLANET this week.
.i will NEVER tire of dance pah-ties.
.i always get super anxious that someone's going to be decapitated when i see lots of surfers.
.have a pleasant day.

bicycling on every wednesday evening...

i...really don't. i don't even know if i ever have. it's mostly been done every other day of the week, i think. haha.
anyway.

yesterday was our last real 236th summer semester ward activity. and guess what.
i was sad.

(i am aware, pretty much everything provokes some great emotion from me, which could mean you judge me to be dramatic...but if that bothers you, you should probably have stopped reading my blog by now. like, NOW. or i'm going to accidentally give you an ulcer, and i don't want that.)

I say to rachel (ratch), all the time, when I get upset about something "I wish I just didn't CARE." One time, she firmly, but kindly, said, "Missy, no you don't." And she's right, and I can't ever forget that. I'm never going to be good at saying goodbyes, but that's okay. If I'm ever in a state of not-missing-someone, either the second coming has occurred, or my heart has turned to stone. So. It's okay.
Also. I've felt a pretty constant feeling--especially since i started college--of frustration...that I'm always missing out on something. There's always somewhere else I could be, someone else I could be with, something else I could be doing. But, oh well. We have to make choices constantly in life, and as long as i don't repeatedly choose to sit home and do nothing, I'm going to have to be happy with whatever I'm doing.

SO. Since I've realized that I'm NEVER going to be able to do EVERYTHING that I wish I could, or I think I should, I should just chill out and be grateful for the things I HAVE done.

Sooooo.
thank you, my darling summer friends, (and eternal family) for helping me (since the beginning of May):
.live in the cutest, happiest, greatest ghetto apt EVER for four months with three of the BEST roomates,
.swwwwim,
.camp,
.have nice talks about everything i could possibly desire,
.be involved in the BEST ward with the BEST calling ever,
.make new friends,
.make better friends,
.read,
.enjoy otter pops and popsicles and snow cones and ice cream and un-cal-fro-yo and MOCHI,
.discover/experience lots of GREAT music,
.watch some old and new WONDERFUL films,
.try loooots of great cuisine,
.trust and be trusted,
.write happy letters,
.take happy photos,
.have fun at family gatherings,
.play at amusement parks,
.ride all over south provo on darling bicycles,
.browse the city biblioteca,
.enjoy porch sitting on summer afternoons and evenings and nights,
.shhhop,
.read lots of informative and some pointless magazine articles,
.attain more freckles and lightened hair from spending time in the ssssun,
.have bonfires. every time i remotely desired one,
.play at that freezing beautiful lake down the road,
.travel down that freezing beautiful river up the road,
.rrrroadtrip,
.looongboard,
.dance my heart out,
.overcome some secret and severely silly fears,
.play in the ocean,
.love urbanness,
.love suburbanness,
.utilize my sunglasses,
.have fun smelling drugs i'm not doing and sweaty people i don't know/attending excellent concerts,
.wear my favorite attire, over and over and over--tshirt and cutoffs/jeans,
.play with sparklers and fireworks,
.sleep in,
.laugh LOADS,
.get free breakfast,
.talk to important byu visitors and new zealanders,
.watch darling love sparks happen,
.cry for not sorrowful reasons,
.read excellent writing/see beautiful photos on bloooogs,
.LOVE,
.be loved,
.see GREAT things,
.gaze and wonder nightly at the BEAUTIFUL night sky,
.sing lots, with lots of talented guitarists and a couple ukuleleists,
.play a little bit of piano and ukulele and guitar...haha,
.help a little african's feet,
.deal with things i needed/need to,
.play nintendo,
.be creative,
.be artistic,
.express myself,
.watch some GREAT musicals,
.learn more about the gospel, people, the world, politics, government, ....lots of things,
.learn more about (by others' example): sacrifice, real love, selflessness, courage, patience, hard work, persistence, finding jooooy in all things...and so much more,
.experience joy and a special unity watching beautiful SOCCER,
.play soccer, frisbee, ultimate, and kickball,
.see a whole lacrosse game,
.enjoy countless gorgeous sunsets and other beautiful skies,
.learn lots of little slivers of languages,
.hear LOTS of awesome experiences in others' lives, especially about missions,
.and help me learn/remember a little better, who i am.

love you,
missy.

i'm breakin out this time, making out with the wind!

this...was...the...best weekend EVER. (the beeest daaay eeeeverrrr! holla to rubie and t.hamp, if he were alive)

friday, i worked THIRTEEN AND A HALF HOURS. STRAIGHT. ON MY FEET. (well, except probably like twenty minutes) and it was soooooo fun. thoughts to myself in the dishroom for the first time in the morning at the morris center, then just crazy super fun in the skyroom with most of my favorite employees and a giant wedding luncheon, then a huuuuge beautiful banquet, at which i saw ALL my favorite catering kids....ahhhh. then saw some explosions and nice people at the taj, and checked out freddie's SICK television...that day was LONG. then darling ratch and hanner and i fell asleep to a nice film. (well, i fell asleep. haha.)

sllllllept in saturday, then ran over to see spain defeat paraguay (haHA!) with sclubseven, then ran home and packed (something i truly LOVE doing, unpacking, on the other hand...) and drove a BEAUTIFUL drive to the cabin, played with the fam, welcomed in independence day with....the great film, independence day! (which, if you haven't seen, is truly patriotic, all about americans being the smartest and best and most awesome...hahahhahahha...top notch.)

sunday, PACKED at the oakley ward, GREAT meeting, which i experienced from the foyer, (there were a TON of babies there. and sometimes i think, it's a good idea, if you need to take a walk, to pretend your young child is fussy. cause most those kids seemed pretty content, not really in need of being taken to the hall...haha...) that ward was so LEGIT. i love really down to earth, humble, people. and two hundred visitors. haha. theeeennn patriotic talks over supper, then hours of bananagrams, then catch phrase, then...a dance off with no music..hahahha

this day, monday, slllleeeept in, again, (SO good.) pancakes homemade by gramma, and scrambled eggs [home]made by grampa, then some jurassic park, then a new arrival, then the lake...canoeing and roasting and playing...then another BEAUTIFUL drive through the canyon, then a roomate reunion/darling view of a backporch, THEN how to train a dragon. if you like cute things, see it. cause it was funny, and sweet, with wonderful animation, and jonsi even sings a song at the end, (CALLED that) and it's just really, really, cute.

right now, i feel like i've fallen head over heels in love with this summer, like i'm speeding down a beautiful sunny road with the windows down, and i've got nothing to lose. and free energy is SO the best soundtrack for it. (thank you, tucker boone.)

with the spirit of a hustla

and the swagga of a college kid.
[cool3r than y0u]

human.robot.human.robot.human. robo-DANCER!

stripes. in a dancing kitchen.
cute friends eating indian cuisine.
kissy faces. (i don't know how to kiss!-rtch) hhahahahhahaha.
excellent dance [birthday]partying.
consuming LOADS of caffeinated soda...healthAY. grood.
cute birthday dinner (thank you friends) with a real indian. (who's really...too legit to quit.)
best friends, always love being with me, you can see by their faces.

i promise i will start using my camera again. and posting my own pictures.
i even took some today.
buuut...til then, thanks rub and alec.

summersick

I know I already wrote a post about summer. But. I don't care.
Summer is the best thing, in the whole world, and yes I would give up snowboarding frequently (since I've been...three times, in the last two years anyway, lame.) to have it all year round.
But I guess for me, at this time in my life, summer is having a stupid job that you kind of maybe like (or maybe just hate) and NO SCHOOL. and PLAAYing every spare moment.
maybe when I grow up, I can focus more on the weather.
I'm so done with school. And...I told someone the other day...maybe ratch, that, I'm so done and that's bad cause I have like fifteen papers to write....
I wasn't exaggerating. Excluding finals, I have fifteen papers to write. hahah.
I don't get homesick. or seasick. I get peoplesick. and summersick.
and when I get really...excited, or nervous, or sad, or happy, or angry, or anyextremeemotiony, I get nauseous.
I am literally sick, about summer. Right now. In the library.
things to do:
camp
picnic
swim
water color
DANCE PARTY
walk-about
wear cut offs
attend concerts
gaze at the starry skies
farmer's market
read beautiful literature
ice cream
DANCE PARTY
practice spanish
work
make healthy food (and eat it)
fruit. eat it.
DANCE PARTY
tie dye. cut off. spray paint. (create clothing)
call friendies on the phone (in logan, or ktown, or cedar, or WA, or FH, or indianers, or alazka, or whatever)
ride a bike
longboard/skate (hahah)
get summer skin
write letters

to name a few.
oh and...DANCE PARTY, maybe.
also, the picture at the top, is a nice tidbit of summer. britter and i were dancing in the car, on a long drive, to techno, with great friends, on the way to an outdoor concert.
SO SUMMER.
aghghghghghhghg
summer. come get me. now.

i am young. so i'm fleeing this town. and i'm not burying any dreams. unless it's to plant a dream tree.

last summer, tiffer got murried.



i played in all the layton and kaysville parks.


the fray and jack's mannequin came...


and i played games with my cute friends. (and said goodbye to quite a few wonderful ones for a couple years...)



it is so GREAT outside. and i cleaned my room last night til four thirtyish. and i am SO excited because it's almost summer. and i am so sick of this school year. even though i like my classes. i just get sick of school.

reckless abandon. like no one's watching you.

that's what i'm going to do to provo
...i wish.

but when summer comes, i'm going to PLAY and have adVENTures and BONfires and write LETTERS and storIES and sWIm and get SUNburned and dAnce and make PICnics and FEasts and go cAMPing and plAAAy with my great great ward and darling friends. (and if any cool people are too many miles away, i suppose we can have lots of great discussions and happening reports over the telephone...that would be great as well.)



won't stop til it's over.